


Our Little Infinity

by Rhiann101



Category: Bellarke - Fandom, The 100 (TV)
Genre: Cancer, Character Death, Cutting, Depression, F/M, Medicine, Protective!Bellamy, War, protective, protective!Clarke
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-20
Updated: 2016-05-22
Packaged: 2018-05-15 02:32:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 21,153
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5767945
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rhiann101/pseuds/Rhiann101
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bellarke fanfiction That is between bellamy and Clarke where clarke is battling with depression after a character death from season 2 episode 'spacewalker' and no matter what she does she cant seem to shake bellamy from her. after she seems to start building up everything around her seems to keep crashing down again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. 1. Why Am I Here?

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, everyone I really hope you enjoy this! I am on wattpad mu name on there is also rhiann101 so i will be transferring it on her for other people who use this website to find it as well. When i update it will be updated here and there thank you!

Clarke's POV:

As I stand there completely compelled by the dark night sky. The only sounds I can register is the slight muffles of the grounders furiously waiting to tackle me. As my eye's travel to the soft grass below my feet a reflection of light shines below my hand. My eyes capture the fast moving object only to realize everything that had just happened. I killed Finn... The one and only person I have ever come to love. He is dead and it was because of me. The shine That my eyes have followed to the slow moving grass was his blood that only seemed to catch the moons lingering light.

I am snapped back into this 'reality' with Lexas' words but, I only seemed to have caught the lest remaining words.

"It is done!" she shouts at the furious grounders that were being lead by the most vengeful person, Indra.

She was ever so right it was done and soon so would I. "no" my thoughts began to consume me "you can't give up" I began to lift my head back to the gate and hear the almost faint sounds coming from what I can only assume to be raven. my mind then began to shift back into thought "think about your mom she had already lost so much..." I think to myself as my head inches to a darkened figure being held by a taller one I know it had to be my mom with Kane.

After searching for more reasons to stay I found none. This is when my darker side came out "leave, no one will miss you, your mother has kane and raven along with many others hate you now" Before I gave myself more time to think my body seemed to have woken up from a coma as I started to turn around. With every step my body takes the more my mind drifts me off into a sea of thought. "die" "no stay, your people need you" And for some reason... some how Ballamy's words started to leak into my mind "its hard being in charge" before I knew what was happening I tripped over something and fell. My hands just seem to catch me in time before I hit the unforgiving soil.

I lifted my shaken body and looked behind me. My legs still dangled off of a fallen log that must have fallen long ago because there was moss all around it seemed to almost claim it. I must have started running with out realizing it because as I stood onto my legs slightly teetering back and forth I could only see the small glimmer of the torches from where I had taken... my thought were stopped as I came crashing to the ground and this time I had no way to cushion the fall. I hit hard and at the same time I instantly seep into a comforting darkness. This darkness consumed every thought leaving me at a temporary peace

My eyes flicker open like a dying candle to the suns harsh rays. I lift my what seems to be heavy head to take in my surroundings. I'm still in the forest and.. I... still... killed... Finn...

at that thought I jolted up like a lightning bolt that had struck the ground and the thunder that had soon followed was my thoughts. Again I became consumed by it, controlled by it. This time I never thought of anything positive and at this realization I knew... I wanted to die. I wanted to be free from this thought of the grief that had now transformed my life into a scared animal that had been trapped in a cage. "STOP!!" I screamed at the top of my lungs as my feet quickly followed the sound as my yell bounced off the mountains that seemed to be filled with secrets that longed to be found, but at this point I couldn't care less because the only secret that I wanted to find out was what happened after death? I was never one to believe in religious legends but at this point I would believe anything that had followed peace. Would I fall into darkness? would anything happen at all? would I be at peace? will I ever see my dad again? questions came and went like an ex boyfriend.

When the sensation of my legs burning like the embers in an old fire. I dropped to the ground on hands and knees. As I did so I heard a loud crunch come from underneath my aching knees. When I heard this I closed my eyes to relieve me from the pain that the memories brought with them. Soon enough I opened them slowly like a door into a new world. I looked below my knees and saw something dark like the nights sky yet soft as I touched it. It seemed like the charcoal I used back on the ark while I awaited my execution. Then it hit me like a golf ball that some dick had hit into the air near a crowd. it was ash... I looked up and saw the after math from the first war. I rose to my feet like the morning sun and started off into the drop ship that they used to get us on to this disastrous earth. Though before I got inside I reached for a knife that had been caste away from a grounder. When I got to the drop ship I slumped against the wall furthest form our makeshift door and rolled up my sleeves but, before I got to do anything I murmured my last few words...

"I'm coming dad" I knew I didn't say anything to my people I was leaving so I whispered to those I have grown to love... "may we meet again" I brought the knife to my wrists and started to put pressure but, movement caught my eye at which caused me to stop as a drop of blood ran down my arm. A figure came up to the door and slid the sheet out of the way that had been blinding those outside from seeing in. The figure stopped and stared in terror then unexpectedly spoke "we will"

——————————————-

thank you so much for reading this is my first fan-fic i hope you enjoyed i am the usual person to keep these things on track given i love writing i will be updating i also have plans for another Bellarke fan-fic new update coming tomorrow!-Rhiann


	2. Protector

Bellamy's POV:

 

As soon as I saw Clarke start to turn the only thought that could be registered was "no Clarke no, no, no, no, please... stay... I need.." No! don't think about that she is your friend Bellamy no! don't. She is leaving? why is she leaving? at this question I hear a gasp and I wistfully turn my head to see that Clarke's mom is just realizing she is leaving. Kane is trying to comfort her but can you really comfort someone about to loose their child... lose? wait! I'm going to lose her aren't I? NO that can't happen.

At this realization I jump up almost dropping raven. I totally have forgotten I was holding her.

"sorry Raven" I almost audibly say. why don't I have my speech? I try and clear my throat as I started to jog to the gates. "open the gates!" I now am able to say even though my voice had started to crack by my last words. A rush of heat ran through my cheeks like a whale taking its final breath before swimming back under the sea. Before I knew it I was running faster and faster with each step. "where would Clarke go? where would she be?" I hit the edge of the forest and it seems that at that same moment I knew where she would go... the drop ship. By the time I reach our now chiseled makeshift gate memories flooded through my brain. I push the memories aside and search our ghostly battle field for Clarke.

I reach the drop ship and tug at the sheets covering the mouth of the drop ship like it is trying to cover a secret. I finally build up the courage, but I was stopped by her words "I'm coming dad" I stand there looking foolish like I was a kid listening in on an adult conversation. But then more words slip through her beautiful lips "may we meet again" at this I grow angry. Angry she wants to leave us, angry she doesn't want to be with us... with m- NO stop just go in!. With in a secant I push the disgusting and slightly burnt sheets out of the way and enter. Before I can stop myself it seems like words from my heart slip out as soon as I see her now fragile head looking up. "we will" I slightly yell from the anger that is still lingering but is now slipping away as I see a tear fall away from her beautiful blue eyes. I am now puddy in her hands.

I look down and see that she has been slowly cutting her wrist ever since I barged in here. no! was all I could think as I start to run to her. My knees and hands fall first to the ground like a heavy item being attracted to the ground by gravity.

"please..." she whispers into my ear as I hold her close to me "make it stop" she continues as I rip a part of my shirt off to wrap it around her wrist. "I'm here princess sh-sh-sh" at the sound of my voice she looks up at me with wet eyes.

"Bellamy?" she asks as she starts to register who I am.

"yes Princess it's me I'm here" I stroke her beautiful blond hair while she searches my face and starts to speak

"I-I.. I want to die" I pull her closer to me and start to hum a melody my mom used to sing to Octavia it was some sort of lullaby, yes... I wanted her to rest, she was hurt and it was killing me. Soon enough she drifts off into my arms. I look down at her face and see she is now at peace. The pain has left her face and its now almost like she is sleeping on a cloud. My princess will be safe now and I will never let ANYTHING hurt her. If anyone even dares to hurt her I will snap their neck so fast they won't even know what just happened. At this I realize... I have feelings for this beauty right here She is mine... a smile sticks onto my face and like a child on my leg no matter what I do it wont budge. I think I always loved her... right from the beginning I have loved her and even more so now, but... how do I tell her? will she eve-

A rustling noise comes from out side, delaying my thoughts. I know that there is no where to hide. I reach for my gun and as soon as I see the figure getting closer to the makeshift door I let the bullet fly out of the barrel of the gun and attack the man in what I can assume to be their shoulder. I grunt is released from the strange man as they hit the ground but then I realize from the sound that its not a man, its a woman.


	3. HOME

Clarke's POV:

 

I had been awaken by the horrid sound of a gun. I frantically scramble to my feet and before I could stop myself I have grabbed Bellamy and he is already taken me in his arms squeezing me tight. I build up the courage to look up into his deep brown eyes and when I do they grow darker.

"Bellamy?" I squeak out as I now have the feeling of something metallic and cold on my fore arm so I look down towards it and see the gun.

He said nothing he just pulls me closer by my hips and squeezes me I could tell he was afraid, But from what? Before my thoughts continued he finally spoke.

"stay here" he says as he releases me from his grip but before he takes anymore steps I grab his arm.

"wait wh-" I was interrupted when he continued "please..." I shook my head like the aftershock from an earth quake. He continues toward the makeshift door and pushed the material out of the way. All I could see was a fragile body that lingers on the ground next to all of the dry bones and ash. I could tell by how his shadow grows smaller then stops that he has now reached the unconscious body.

I slowly started to walk toward the makeshift door to see what had happened when I was stopped by the faintest whisper "don't move..." This voice was deeper and menacing. I flipped around to see a tall built man standing next to me with a knife in hand pointed directly at me and as I follow the point of the knife it leads to my stomach. I shudder a breath to calm my anxiety as it reaches sky level.

"up the ladder sky girl" he breaths almost immediately I obey, but what he doesn't know is I have very recently had a death wish... he doesn't scare me but I do want to know what he wants. I knew I didn't want to make a sound because that would mean putting Bellamy in danger and I wouldn't be able to handle it if he was hurt because of me.

We reach the top level and I couldn't help my curiosity anymore I needed to know before I die.

"what do you want?" I ask as he closes the hatch he swiftly turns and throws me against the wall and even I could not stop the yelp that slips through my cracked lips that are almost as broken as I am. I had to handle this before Bellamy came rushing in after me and it seemed the grounder knew as well as he grabbed a metal piece that we used before to lock the hatch.

I could hear Bellamy's worried yells from bellow that hatch as he climbs up the ladder carelessly.

"Clarke!!!" he yells continuously

"leave or die sky boy" the grounder practically growls as he turns his head to the hatch. I take this moment to my advantage and grab the knife I used to cut my wrist out of my pocket and pull it to his neck.

"obviously you didn't know I already had a death wish" I almost yell as I bring the knife back to slash his neck but he grabs my arm and twists it as I scream in pain.

"Clarke?? CLARKE! are you ok????" Bellamy obviously heard what I had said, followed by my scream of pain that echoed throughout my bones. "Clarke answer me!"

"I'm just fine Bellam-" I tried to answer but he jabs his elbow into my chest knocking the wind out of me as if my soul left my body. I hunch over dropping the knife to the ground while he kicks my chest in. More screams and yelps rush out of my mouth but I seemed to get a few words out.

"B-Bellam-my RUN!" Bellamy was still banging on the hatch, begging myself to black out, to not feel the pain anymore. I watch the hatch jump up and down from the force of Bellamy I look at the metal piece the grounder had forced there to keep it closed had been bending.

My eyes widen as I realize my savior is coming, he will help, I am safe... with Bellamy. later better than never the metal piece gives into the force and the hatch whips open with a loud bang as it smacks against the hard steel like a tree falling to the ground Bellamy emerges from it soon after.

He drawls his gun from his pocket and points it at the grounders head and with in a secant the familiar loud ring screams in my ears and the grounder falls to the ground and into oblivion. Bellamy wastes no time getting to my side to check my wounds.

"Oh My God... I thought I was gonna loose you dammit! don't you do that again Clarke griffin" he almost yells at me but a smile creeps onto his face... his award winning smirk. At this movement I feel safe but it doesn't stop there he embraces me and lift me into his arms. I feel at home.


	4. The Color Of Love

Bellamy's POV

 

We trudged through the thick, dense forest together. The entire time was filled with the sound of our breathing and the constant crunch under my tired feet. I look down at the beautiful blonde that lies in my arms and suddenly the aching of my feet goes numb while I stare at her wonderful features and her bright blue eyes. My gaze is interrupted when she speaks.

"I can walk you know" she mumbles the words between her chipped lips.

 

"But if I were to let you walk by yourself I don't think you would follow me now would you?" I ask while I snap my head up to refocus my attention on the forest.

 

"I-you-bu" she sighs in defeat after her supposed protest but expectantly she continues. "I think that is something I should decide for myself now isn't it?" she breathes the last few words.

 

At her words my heart seemed to have skipped a beat and my veins seemed to fill with the poison she had filled me with. "she hates you" side affects pound in my brain, words I never wanted to hear come from her. Its killing me, the thought that she wants to leave us, leave her mom... leave me.... Without any further thought I spoke up.

"Ok then WHY THE HELL! do you want to die huh?" I spit at her as I lower her legs to drop to the ground, but before she could turn from me I grabbed her arm forcing her to look at me. "Clarke!" I continue at her while with each moment anger laces with my nerves making my hands shake ever so slightly. With in a moment she replies with tears in her eyes making me release her arm and step away while she speaks as realization hits at what I was just doing to her... hurting her.

"Please... I... I can't do this" She sniffles at the end of her sentence using the back of her hand to wipe at her nose.

 

"Clarke..." I coo her name not trusting myself to come any closer to her as I fear my heart would explode with emotion. "You are NOT alone in this" I make it clear to emphasize the words I meant to let her know.

 

"I... I know I just..." She stops her words as she falls to the ground while her sobs wrack through her now fragile body. Watching this scene roll out before my eyes causes me to fall apart myself.

 

"sh sh sh..." I coo along with her sobs as she shakes between my hold on her. I'm against her back with my arms around her trying to comfort her with everything I have. At this moment I would to anything to all, but ease the pain from her tortured soul. I would switch roles with her in a heart beat if it meant she was no longer in pain. "It's ok, your ok... I'm here sh sh sh" I continue to coo her hoping she will fall asleep to escape the pain she is in.

 

"No... no I'm not" She sobs as she pulls away from me and stand up swatting me away. "No Bellamy I'm not!" She continued as she backed away from me.

 

"Clarke..." I warned

 

"No! no Bellamy you... you can't-you don't get to..." she breaths her words as if she were a fish out of water gasping to return. She nervously runs her hand through her tangled blonde hair. I cautiously walk toward her with my arm stretched out toward her in attempt to comfort her, but with a turn on her heals she runs to my left away from me.

"Clarke!!" I bellow from the depths of my voice box while running after her desperately trying to stop her from leaving. I can't loose her not now... not ever....

Sprinting as fast as my legs will carry me as my breathing becomes more labored and my surroundings blur into shades of green all around me with only one color that stands out to me... Love.


	5. 5. To Be Alone

Clarke POV:

 

All I could think about was running. run, run, run faster And so I do faster and faster my feet hit the ground almost numbingly so.

My thoughts were broken by the sound of his voice...

"Clarke!"

I'm sorry Was all I could think. I couldn't take this anymore I had to get away from here... from him. Everyone and everything I touch... dies. Finn... he cared for me and that was apparently a fatal mistake. I couldn't let that happen to anyone else especially Bellamy.

Faintly, slowly Bellamy's voice drifts off as if the Titanic had finally gone completely under water. In this story I do loose the boy so yes I admit it my life is officially like the titanic but, in this story I'm going down with the ship.

I looked behind me for a quick second just to make sure he was gone. As I turned my head I saw the faint silhouette of him.... Green, black and yellow surrounded me, controlled me. These colors came to an end as I lost feeling in my legs and dropped to the ground. At this moment I couldn't care less if my head hit the ground, so I let it. Almost as fast as I smashed into the ground I blacked out into the darkness, as I let it consume me I only thought of those who I loved...

Once I look around, all I could see was darkness... was it night? or was I dreaming? I lifted my head and searched my surroundings as if I could find the answers somewhere. As my eye's adjusted I think I must be in a cave of some sort. I turn my body so I can sit up but, my muscles scream at me in protest. Once I have been completely moved I lean against the wall before moving to stand. I start lifting my body but, my achy and tired muscles resist my erg to stand so instead I sit back down. After that fail attempt I decide I should go for more a vocal approach so I open my mouth and ask.

"Hello?"

My voice was barley audible from the lack of use. how long was I asleep? I search my surrounding once more and this time I see a glimmer of light. Hope stirred inside me screaming for me to get up and find out who or what is down there. I try once more to pick my self up as the adrenaline rushes through my body in hope that I could get out of this hell hole. I start my way down the cave towards the light with the little amount of energy I am running on. Finally I reach the light that is just around the corner but, before I make myself known I peek in to make sure it was safe. As soon as I see who it is anger rushes through me. how could he? why can't he just let me go? for once! one time was all I needed... one chance.... As soon as I was sure he didn't see me I started back down the cave and back to the outside world.

Once I was almost back to what looked like the exit I heard a voice.

"And where do you think your going?" He bellowed from the bottom of his throat, filled with authority.

I froze in my steps Afraid to take another one In fear that he would disapprove once again and use the anger inside of him to yell at me. I thought it over and got over it with in seconds I have to go now! this is my only chance... I started towards the "exit" while I can but, soon enough I heard Bellamy's voice once again.

"Please... Stay..."

I turned to look at him and quickly regretted it once I saw his face in the dim light. Watery eyes, sad expression that looked like a puppy was begging for scraps. I decided to reply to him this time so I cleared my throat.

"For what? more pain? more deaths? what! because I sure as hell don't see why?" I countered

Soon enough he spoke again this time more demanding and filled with anger.

"No! for me! Why can't you see that? Huh? Why don't you see that you are surrounded by people who love you!? Please, explain because I damn well don't know."

During his little speech he started to walk closer to me as I started to walk further away from him. Given my weakened state he quickly caught up to me and grabbed my forearm, turned me to look at him. As soon our eyes met I saw the reason he wanted me to stay... he liked me.... Once I thought of this I decided to ask him instead.

"You... you like me. Don't you?" I ask barley above a whisper.

"Whoa now princess don't get ahead of your self." He replies releasing my arm form his vice like grip.

As though on cue the wind from outside the cave whistles through the trees making a swoosh sound bringing in cold air. We both shiver at the change in temperature as our eyes met he began again.

"Please, come back in. I have a fire going. stay?"

I knew what he was really asking he was really asking me to stay... but, with him in this world and not just for the night. Forever he would want me to say but I wasn't sure if I could keep that promise so after a moment of thought I give him an answer that would have to satisfy him for now.

"Just for tonight"

With that we both went back down to where he had the fire going and we sat there for what seemed like for hours and hours. We both knew we would not be able to sleep tonight with the uncertainty from the other. Silence was only lifted a bit when the wind picked up created that whoosh sound once again. The amount of tension in the air could only be sliced with the sharpest knife out there. Soon enough exhaustion took over and I fell into the darkness with my thoughts surrounding me causing a peaceful sleep to be unheard of. Night mares plagued my dreams filled with the faces I betrayed. As if I had only slept five minutes I had awaken to the light of the morning sun and the dry air. Silence washed over the cave and this time there was no wind.

I picked my now slightly refreshed body up off the ground to sit but, as I looked around I found myself alone.... Bellamy was no where in sight.


	6. Just Gonna watch Me Burn

Bellamy:

while Clarke was sleeping I decided to go out and try to get some food. So far I only caught 4 rabbits and a squirrel good enough for 2, but I figure she is going to be asleep for a while. So, I might want to try and get some more for our trip back... hopefully.

Suddenly, a loud snap comes from my left. I crouch down by a tree hoping what ever it is didn't see me. Once I worked up the courage I peered past the tree to find the source of the noise. I scoffed to myself when I didn't see anything so I stood up and started my way again when movement caught my eye and when I looked I couldn't believe my eyes.

A Two Headed Deer!

I grabbed my knife from my back pocket and dusted it off. I quietly thanked myself for practicing with Murphy and Adam. As I aimed my knife hopefully towards its heart I pulled my arm back for some accuracy, I let it fly and it struck the Buck in its chest. Unfortunately the buck was running off, so I decided to ran after it grabbing for another knife and slinging it at it neck to hopefully knock it down long enough to tie him up. Although I missed his neck I struck his chest again. The Buck yelped in pain and started to yell a distress call. Guilt flooded my system as I watched the poor animal give up and fall to the ground. I knew it was some what safe to approach it given it stopped those awful noises that it released. I cautiously walked to the Buck grabbing the front hooves and tying them then repeated this action to the back hooves. Then tying a link of rope between the two separate knots and using that to carry it on my back. A hundred to a hundred and fifty lbs. of animal on your back makes it hard to travel so i may be a while.

In the back of my mind I give a prayer that Clarke has not yet awaken other wise she might get scarred that I am not there. I just hope she is okay and is still there when I get back.

Clarke:

Did he leave me? Does he even want me here? Did he trick me? How could I be this stupid? he has to be around somewhere. I slowly stand up so I don't get dizzy. I should call out his name, right? He wouldn't have gone that far?

"Bellamy?" I just barley squeak out. I Quickly clear my throat and try again.

"Bellamy are you there?" This time it's very audible. My voice travels past the cave walls and returns back to me.

No answer comes back only my echo and the sound of water dripping somewhere in the cave. Where is he? Is he okay? Please be okay! I start to shift towards the cave wall about foot away from me. My breath quickens as my lungs feel as though they were contracting in on me like a constrictor snake squeezing me to my last breath. I grip the jagged walls scratching them to try and get a hold of my breathing. In, Out, In, Out... 1... 2... 3... it's okay, it's going to be okay!

My face becomes damp as i soon realize I am crying. What is this? What is happening to me? Then I remember my Anxiety and panic attacks as a kid. I'm having a panic attack... I'm having a panic attack. Instead of steadying my breathing it quickens even more as I gasp for my breath as if someone is stealing it straight from my lungs.

"Bell-*gasp*-amy" I say it more as a prayer than a call for help. I think I need to distract myself so this will stop. I look over my shoulder for a distraction of any kind to stop this. I need to focus, but I can't with a panic attack at sue. My eyes follow over to the dimly lit fire still glowing from last night? At least I think that's how long I've been out.

I move towards the still blazing embers and take one out with a stick. I grab the one side that is not on fire and pick it up slowly. A tear runs down my cheek like as if it was racing to get to the bottom. I angrily rub it away with the back of my hand. My breathing is interrupted by the hiccups I consume. If I don't do this now I will pass out for who knows how long.

I bring my hand holding the burning ember towards my opposite arm and quickly press it on my forearm palm up, just below my right wrist. I yelp in pain as more tears rush down my face once more, But they aren't sad tears they are angry tears, angry he isn't hear, angry I had a panic attack, angry at myself for everything I have done. It hurt like a bitch, but it had to be done, so I did it. Now one question is still at bay... am I free now?

I remove the ember from my arm and throw it back in the fire as my breathing finally comes down and relief touches my angry soul. Calming me enough to focus on the only thing that matters... surviving.

Bellamy:

I finally reach the cave that we have been staying in after hours of trenching through the sorrowful forest. As I enter I realize it is very quiet as I assume she is most likely still sleeping, thank god.

I turn that awfully familiar corner to where we stay to find Clarke kneeling down facing the quiet fire filled with empty embers just staring into it, past it. I raise my eyebrow in question towards her as I drop the heavy buck and small animals to the cold cave ground. At this moment I decide to say something and snap her out of this trance because to be honest it's scaring the hell out of me.

"Clarke, are you okay?" I question as her head snaps up and her eyes fill with something I can't read just yet, worry?

She takes a breath in and stares into my eye's "Oh my god" she quickly stands and runs the short distance to me then engulfs me into an embrace. I of course Hug her back, tightly, silently thanking who ever that she is still here and is in fact okay. We let go of each other after a few minutes of comfortable silence. I reach my hand up and touch her cheek as she leans into my touch.

"Your okay?" I ask her this of more than to question her physical appearance, but her mental one and I know she knows what I mean.

"I'm okay" She replies with a gentle smile and a soft tear running down her face. I catch it with my thumb before it falls.

"good" I whisper to her and then continue "I hope your hungry" I end it with a smile back to her in hope to lighten the mood. It does and I know because she gives in to a small laugh. That's enough for me.

About a half hour later we have skinned and cooked the deer without a problem after 10-15 frustrating minutes of trying to get the fire going. After that we sit in silence all through our meal before I break it.

"So, I figured we keep the rabbits and the squirrel away for our travels giv-" I was abruptly cut off by her as she asks.

"To where?" She looks straight up at my as in question.

I give a shocked expression given I would have thought she would want to come back, she needs to come back. "To camp Jaha I thought that's where we were going, to head back there. You know our people need us, right?" I question.

"I-" She cuts herself off before continuing "I can't do this right now." She quickly stands up and starts off towards the mouth of the cave, but I am quicker and i grab the forearm of her right wrist to turn her when I am interrupted by her hiss as if she was in pain. I pull away as fast as possible like I was burned by her and looked down at my fingers when I feel a weird texture. All over my fingers is blood, I whip my head back up to look at her for any clue's, anything that could explain this... oh god, is she hurt!? how? when?

Clarke:

I see his worried expression look me over so find the source of the blood that now trickles past his fingers from when her pressed them inter my burn. I was hoping ti was sealed by now but it wasn't it was still very open from earlier. I start to shake my head as to tell him not to ask, but he does anyway.

"What the hell is this? huh Clarke?" He forcefully questions.

"Just-I-" I take a breath before continuing "I had to"

he reaches for my arm again, but I pull away from him and out of reach. Anger again fills my sense's as I turn on him.

"This was your fault" I raise my vice at him as if to prove a point.

"How is thi-" He tries to question, but I cut him off.

"When you left me... When you were gone and I was here!... alone! you scarred me! and... I... I had a panic attack and..." I gesture towards my injured arm. "I had to do this before I passed out" I continue with a lower, quieter voice that would be mistaken for being sad.

"Clarke I- I'm sorry I didn't mean for that to happen you know that right?" I nod my answer and he slowly reaches towards my arm again "Now let me see it... what did you do?"

I pull my arm away once more out of his reach and take a few steps back before answering

"It's fine" I answer looking at the cave floor.

"Clarke god dammit show me... now!" He almost shouts, voice full of anger and grief.

Before I could protest he takes a step forward and grasps my arm turning it over to see despite my effort to stop him. He looks down at the burn and swears under his breath before returning his eyes back to me. Shaking his head at me as to say I shouldn't have done that.

He then rips off a part of his shirt and wraps it around my arm over the burn and ties it, tight.

He must have been at least a bit angry at me for what I did, given he didn't talk to me for the rest of the time until we both fell asleep. And I knew in the morning her would have me haul my ass out of here with him to camp Jaha at which I did not look forward to.

In the morning we did as I planned we would and got there in less than a day with out a word to each other. Soon enough We reached Camp Jaha at night because we both stopped for a swim regretfully so given I am freezing and I know he is too, I can see him shivering even past the sound of out teeth chattering.

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Thank you so much for reading it means a lot I'm sorry about the late update I'm trying my hardest if you have any idea's please comment them I will reply to each and every single one of them.

This is my twitter: Rhiann DeCarr

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	7. My Weakness

Before I start I just wanted to let you know I have decided this will become a really really long fan fiction if you like that idea please favorite or comment something to let me know thank you so much.

Bellamy:

We have been in the med bay for hours now because of Abby. Every time I tried to leave she would scold me saying 'I just want to make sure you guys are okay' Which is a reasonable reason given we have been gone for a couple of days. With me and Clarke on the examination table Abby looks both of us over; every single inch. I was dreading the moment Abby comes to find Clarke's burn and cut. Though of course she quickly finds it and sends me out of the room as I would guess to talk with her.

While I wait for her I start heading to the 'cafe' so get something to eat considering my stomach has been making noises since we got here. As soon as I step into the small hut I spot Jasper and Monty jumping to their feet to greet me.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you, and thank you!" Monty practically yelled as he engulfs me into a hug with Jasper not far behind.

With me not big on hugs I just stand there frozen in place as if their touch laid a curse upon me as to not move.

"What are you talking about?" I question them both as they release me from their vise like grip.

Jasper looks up at me given our height difference and replies "For bringing Clarke back"

now that makes a lot more scents then what I could come up with. "Oh um well what would we do with out our princess, huh?" I tell them with my signature smirk hanging loose on my face.

I turn my head towards the exit to the hut and catch Clarke walking out of the med bay. Before they could have a chance to reply I left the 'cafe' and headed towards Clarke. It seemed like she didn't notice me yet because if she did she sure didn't acknowledge it. Once I reached her I tapped her shoulder to stop her journey to her tent. She quickly turned around almost running into me before finding it was me. She strangely looked confused as to why I was here?

her expression quickly changed, but I could see right through it. "hey" she dryly said not looking me in the eyes.

"hey, where are you going?" I question stepping back and gesturing in front of her as to explain what I meant.

"uh- to my tent to sleep?" She tells me though it sounds more like a question.

"I shake my head in understanding, but change my mind. "Why don't you come eat something? then you could come back after?"

"No, thanks. I'm really tired" She tries to turn and walk away, but I grab her arm and turn her around to face me.

"Clarke-" Before I can continue she twists her arm out of my grip and walks off leaving me to stand there. Frozen in my spot.

With out further hesitation I follow her into her tent, but when I got there she was on her cot turned away from me. Looking as though she was asleep, but I knew no one could fall asleep that easily.

"Clarke... I know your not sleeping" I blankly tell her slightly above a whisper growing annoyed.

She turns over to look at me and replies barley whispering. "I just want to sleep... please?" and before I had the chance to give in she continues "I promise I'll eat in the morning, bell" the nick name did something to me that made my chest compress.

"Okay, Princess... good night."

"night"

I left her tent and headed towards mine with out one thought that was not about her.

. . .

The next morning I felt just a little bit sore from sleeping in a cave the night before. Judging from the light it must be about 6 or 7 in the morning. Slowly I moved from my bed and out of my tent like a bear that had just awaken from hibernation. Once outside I take a look around and see only a few people outside and the glowing embers in the fore pit. I walk over to the fire pit and put some logs in form the pile next to it. I play with the fire using a stick while leaning slightly over it to blow and start a flame. Once it started I walk over to the food shack and grab some breakfast. Not forgetting about what Clarke said last night I grab a plat of deer meat for her as well and start walking to her tent. careful not to drop it I enter her tent cautiously.

I set the plate down on her make shift side table making a 'clank' sound causing her to stir in her sleep. I curse under my breath and hope not to be the reason she woke up. Given her will to want to go to sleep so early yesterday made me feel guilty that I even made her stir.

I slowly start stepping out of her tent backwards, but of course I trip on the tent's rope that keeps it stable. My sore bones cry out as I reach the unforgiving soil and I release a grunt while trying to catch myself. Of course I fail. I now lay there on the ground listening to find out if Clarke had been awaken during all the noise I have made. Though of course I did wake her sighing at myself for even coming in here. I listen to her continue to stir then it stops. I tense for a moment hoping she doesn't see me.

"Bellamy?" She almost inaudibly asks.

"Yes, Princess?" I lift my self from the ground; now standing.

"What-are you doing in here?" she looks around confused "are you okay?- what happened?"

"It's okay princess I'm okay I was just..." I point to the plate of food sitting on the table. "I brought it in for you to eat for breakfast. Because you didn't eat last night so..."

She looks over at the food confused at first and then looks back at me. "oh uhm... thank you- I guess"

Rubbing the sleep out of her eye I take it as a gesture to leave, but when I attempt to she calls after me "Bell?"

I stop in my tacks and lift the tent flap to look at her "Yes Princess?"

She looks at me sheepishly with many attempts to speak until she sighs and asks "Can- *sigh* can you stay with me?" She finishes with a glassy smile and it looks as if she is about to cry, until I swoop in and hug her as I lay down next to her on the left side of the cot.

I kiss the top of her head to sooth her before she cries though I fail "Of course I will, Princess."  
I bring her closer to me and hope to god she doesn't continue crying. She gets a bit louder and then at full force she starts sobbing loudly into my shirt. I curse under my breath. I absolutely hate anyone crying from a baby to an elder it just breaks my heart, but when Clarke started to cry I really felt as though I was about to cry. She is the strongest person I have ever met; the fact that she is the one sobbing into my shirt breaks me.

"Please Princess... stop" I sigh as my voice cracks a bit.

she looks up at me with a sad expression yet a confused one and whispers "sorry"

I look up at the tent as my eyes start to water trying not to give it away that I was crying, but Clarke knows and I hear her sobs turn into a slight giggle. I look down at her shocked at what I just heard.

"what?" I ask shocked still

"you" she giggles again "I didn't know you were so soft" she pokes my chest giving me annother watery smile as I look back at her. She wipes her thumb across my cheek wiping something wet. I then realize I had been letting my tears fall.

"Oh shush up Princess" She releases another small laugh before laying her head on me again.

"Rest" I whisper to her.

"you too... morning..." she whispers pulling a small chuckle from my throat.

 

"Morning" And after that the darkness consumes me.

Thank you so much for reading this and once again please COMMENT any suggestion, ideas or even just to comment to let me know you enjoy this and like the idea of this becoming a long story. :D


	8. Our Great Escape

Once we got up from our little cat nap we went back out into the chilly morning air. I looked up at the sun and judging by it's position it is about noon. I look over at Bellamy to find him already gazing at me.

"What?" I ask him in a tone so only so he could hear me.

"I think I..." He stops himself and sighs before I interrupt him.

"I love you too" I whisper to him with a smile.

"Do you now?" he say's sarcastically. pulling me closer to him as if I tried to get away from his grasp.

"Nope. I'm just kidding" I smirk up at him playfully before skipping off to the med bay.

"Oh your going to get it now" I hear him faintly say as he jogs up to me and engulfs me into his arms: lifting me while spinning. I squeal in joy and surprise until he puts me down. taking the moment I take off again toward the wall laughing to myself.

"Now where could the princess be?" He makes a show of huffing while walking towards where he must have seen me run off to. I hide behind tents peeking through any of the tents to try and see where he is. The camp seems to grow silent as if they were all watching. I finally get a glimpse of him but, find him talking to my mother and Kane. All three have that seriousness in their faces. I drop the fun and games and walk over to them: Bellamy notices and pulls me to him by my waist once I arrive.

 

"what's going on?" I ask looking over at my mother and glancing at Kane.

None of them speak so Bellamy turns me to face him "We are trying to come up with a plan to get our people out of mt. Weather." He answers with a saddening smile. I nod my head in affirmation that I understand.

"We should start a meeting with the grounders soon. Use the alliance that we now have with them to start planning." Kane say's stiffly.

"Agreed" The rest of us say at once

"we should send someone ahead to let them know we will be coming soon" My mother adds. I counter her. "Lincoln" I suggest. "And Octavia" Bellamy adds. I look up at him to make sure he is 100% on the idea. He just nods at me.

"Vary well then we send them tonight and we leave in the morning" Kane replies to us. We then nod and separate from each other. Bellamy grabs my fore arm and swiftly tuns me around into him.

"I want to show you something... You know because we are about to go into another war and all..." He takes my hands in his resting his fore head against mine. "Sure" I answer quietly slowly bringing him in for a hug.

"To where?" I ask unable to keep my curiosity in a bottle any longer.

He doesn't answer quickly and instead reaches into his back pocket and pulls a cloth out. I look up at him in question. "Put this on" Is all he say's before placing the cloth on me acting as a blindfold.

"I hope trusting you won't become a mistake Bellamy Blake." This releases a bubbly laugh from his throat.

"I certainly hope not" He tells me before putting his hand on my lower back and leading me somewhere. All I know is that we are away from camp is him yelling 'open the gate' and the sounds of the camp gets quieter every secant is anything to go on.

What I can only assume would be after about 10 minutes later of trying not to trip and him whispering into my ear sweat nothings once we stopped walking we must have been there. I attempt to take the blind fold off but he stops me. "Not yet princess... not yet" I huff with anticipation building to see what he has brought me too. Without warning he lowers me to the ground. Sweet smells rush through my senses and fill me with joy. Excitement also courses through me. Now fully laying on the grounds: which feels like silk he takes the blind fold off.

I gasp at amazement from what I can see. Trees line my vision from above with the blue sky touching each one of them: grasping onto it like a life line. My eyes turn away from it and turn to see what the silky touch is to find a bed of flowers that I am laying on. I quickly turn over to see Bellamy watching me in amusement. "How did you find this place?" I ask shockingly.

"When me and the guys went hunting we came a crossed it. I thought you might like it." I smiled at him. My eyes raked over his face and down to his lips. I feel as though I am cured from my sadness though sorrow may still course through my veins and may I never forget about Finn. In this moment. here. Right now. I felt a release. Our great escape.

He must have felt the moment and the air shift as well Because he leaned over taking my chin in his hand and pulling my lips to meet his in a quick movement. It is then I realize that this... is out first kiss. I know he knows too which brings me to love him a bit more. It's amazing how you could fall in love with someone with out even kissing them. That is true love. Question rushes through me as well as excitement. If I am in love with him... that makes him my weakness... He makes me happy but, happiness can be taken away.

He must have notices the change in my expression and tells me sternly "Stop thinking about it and kiss me damn it" I smile through the kiss and continue kissing him back. Our lips caressing each other as well as hands and before I knew it time slipped away and so did our clothes.

 

Thank you again for continuing this story and I have decided to continue for a long time I will definitely try and update more. Yes this was vary fluffy but i thought they deserved it at least for a little while...


	9. Only Human

Bellamy:

As we walk back hand in hand I notice that the weather has certainly taken a turn. This has to be one of the coldest nights so far since we have landed. I pull Clarke a little closer to me as we continue to walk back to camp.

"Is it me or is it getting colder outside now a days?" she quietly asks as to not drawl attention to us.

"I think fall is starting." I pull her even closer practically side hugging her as we get closer to camp.

She stops walking and looks to her left, walking away from me.

"What is it?" I whisper to her so only she could barely hear me. She looks over to me and smiles brightly. I smile at her back just because Seeing her so happy makes me happy after what we just went through. She then leans over and picks up a plant that I don't recognize.

"What's that princess?" I walk closer to her trying to see what she has in a better light.

"It's a plant that help's with pain." She replies slightly jumping up and down. I chuckle watching her excitement grow.

"Okay. Now let's make this quick princess I'm freezing." I emphasize the word freezing by rubbing my hands up and down my arm. She puts up no fight and quickly tugged as much of the plants from the ground and putting them inside her bag.

"Okay let's go" She puts her bag back on and walks towards me. I pull her next to me as we were before we stopped. After a long cold half hour walk back most everyone in camp are asleep. The whole camp is silent other than the crunching sound from under our feet as we walk over the fallen leaves. As we reach the tents she stops and turns to me then kisses me on the cheek and starts to walk away. while telling me "Night Bell." But before she could get too far I grabbed her hand and spun her around and whispered

"you missed" before bring her lips into a kiss for about 3 seconds but it felt longer and then pulled away. "Night Princess" I turn my head just to see her in the corner of my eye and seeing her standing there frozen. I fall asleep with a smile on my face.

. . .

 

Once I wake all I see is the sun's rays bright in my face. I groan as i roughly get up from my warm bed and start to dress, but notice something. A dark thing laying on my make shift chair I use for planning out the shifts for the guards. I walk over to it and lift it up. A coat? I lift it up grateful for it but questions plague my brain. Who? and Why? With out further question I slip the coat on. Something falls to my feet and I look to see a long cloth. A scarf? I again gratefully grab it and swing it around my neck before walking out into the crisp air. It has to be just as cold as last night which probably means I'm up early and if not many people around camp as much as usual is another sign of that I don't know what is. I glance around camp to make sure everything is in order before making my way to the ark.

Once inside the ark I Abby and start making my way to her, but before I can ask her how everything was doing she quickly interrupted me making my mouth open and close at her words "If your looking for Clarke she is in the med bay helping out." Helping out with what exactly? since when? Though in stead of asking Abby I decide to ask the Princess herself. I start making my way down the narrow hallway like a man on a mission and practically bust into the Med bay. I take a look at my surroundings and see many guards men on the small make shift beds moaning and groaning.

"What the hell?" I whisper mostly to myself. Each of the guards have weird wounds that are covered in their own blood. There must have been 20 people on separate beds littering the med bay. Finally My eye's land on the blonde haired princess who is leaning over a wounded man. I see that she also has received a coat similar to mine. I was searching for and immediately remember why I burst in here. She hasn't noticed me yet, which isn't exactly a good thing given that means she must be vary distracted. I swiftly walk over to her latching my hand to her forearm and turning her to look at me. She looks startled once I have her fully turned to look at me, and tired. Dark circles rim around her ocean blue eyes. Pale skin like a ghost slightly shakes under my hold.

"What the Hell is going on, Clarke?" She sheepishly looks away from my gazing eye's almost like she can find the answer to my question on the faces of the injured. I gently squeeze her arm a bit tighter getting her to look at me. She reaches up with her free hand and fixes my scarf. "huh?" I practically growl. Angry That no one came to get me and mostly angry at her for not telling me.

She sighs looking as though she was trying to collect her thoughts. "Mountain men" She almost whispers looking down at her boots as if something interesting is down there.

I release her arm and grab hold of her chin forcing her to look me into my eye's "Please tell me you have not been here all night" I sternly warn her more than ask her. She doesn't answer which let's me know that she has. "when?" but before I let her answer I ask another thing I was also wondering "How long?"

She closes her eye's for about a few seconds before looking at me. "Last night when you went to bed I went to my tent to sleep, but then I heard commotion outside and wanted to see what was happening to find out that the mountain men attacked a team of guards that had been hinting." She takes a deep breath and I lower my hand from her face letting the information seep into my thoughts, but before I can completely comprehend it she continued. "I have been here for about" She glances at her watch that she had once lost until Finn had given it back to her. "11 hours" I glance at her watch seeing that it is about 7 in the morning and finding that we must have come back around 9 last night. I huff in frustration about to scold her when a loud hacking sound comes from behind me stopping me.

Clarke jogs over to the man the sounds were coming from and turns him on his side allowing him to release blood onto the floor next to Clarke's boots. More doctors must have heard him as well because about 2 more ran into the med bay ushering me out of there so they can get to work, helping them.

I walk back through the long narrow hallway and back to where I last saw Abby. I see her talking to Jackson before noticing me and excusing herself from the conversation. She looks stressed. "What does this mean?" I sternly ask not taking any crap answers she was probably going to throw my way. Though surprisingly she looks me straight in my eye's and takes about two steps closer to me causing me to tense a bit under her eye's

"War" she whispers so only I can hear her. Then tries to walk away, But not before I could grab a hold of her so that I can catch up. Before I could ask for more information about the men in the med bay she pushes past me and jogs down the hallway into the med bay to help with Jackson at her heals not even acknowledging my presence. Swearing under my breath I head back outside to wait for Clarke to exit.

It took about 4 hours, But she finally comes out of there and jumps a bit when she noticed me sitting on the ground. I jump up grabbing her arm and pulling her towards my tent. "Bellamy" She weakly speaks to him. "Bellamy!" She almost yells a bit more sternly causing me to falter in my steps trying to decide whether to stop and look at her or keep going, but before I could decide she rips her arm from my grip which makes me turn to look at her. "I only came out here for a break, they need me in there"

"And what YOU need is sleep" I scold her reaching for her arm again, But she Pulls away from my reach.

"No, Bellamy what I need is to save those men." She breaths in and sighs "We already lost four" She starts to turn away and walk, but I'm faster and catch up to her walking with her.

"Look, Clarke you haven't sleep all night, Please!" I beg her walking backwards so that I could watch her face as she decides.

"I will live Bellamy. Doctors have gone days without sleep, It's what I've been trained to do" She huffs in frustration.

"That may be true, but becoming a doctor doesn't give you super powers, Clarke." I steps in front of her stopping her from walking forward any more before continuing. "your only human" She breaths out, knowing that she must be considering my words. Before she has a chance to reply she wavers on her feet as I instinctively reach out to steady her. "Have you even eaten anything? or drink anything?"

"Yes, Bellamy" She answers me seemingly annoyed with all my questions

"I look at her straight in the eye's until she looks back. "Clarke" I snap at her making her tell me the truth. She shakes her head no before her knees give out. "Clarke!" I try get her attention, but end up having to catch her before she hit the ground and cause any damage to her. "Jesus Princess, it's like babysitting a 3 year old" I wait a second before lowering her to the ground and putting my hands on her face lightly slapping her cheeks trying to awaken her. "Hey, Clarke! Hey..." I put my left arm under her knees and my right, stronger arm under her upper back, lifting her up. Once I have walked to my tent I put her down on my cot and pulled her covers over her, allowing her to sleep. After getting her fully settled with a can of water on the make shift table, I walk back out for my guard shift.


	10. 10. Very Interesting

Clarke:

It's been around 2 months since the grounders attacked our men that were out on a hunting trip. Also of course Bellamy barley left my side. the only time I get to be alone is when I go to the bathroom, which seems to be a lot lately. I'm pretty sure Bellamy thinks I am doing it on purpose just to get away from him but, I'm really not. I also feel a little off and I don't like it at all. Of course I can't tell Bellamy because we all know he wouldn't even let me out of our tent. So, my other choice is either my mother or Lincoln. I do NOT want to go to either. My mother would worry just like Bellamy and if i tell Lincoln he'll wind up telling Octavia who will tell Bellamy. Though I have no choice so... Lincoln it is.

I may have missed my menstrual period, but I'm still getting cramps. Which annoys the crap out of me. Speaking of annoying here comes the devil.

"Hey, Princess" Bellamy said as he walks over to stand next to me.

"Hey, keeper" I look over to Bellamy as he looks down at me questioningly. Igive him a hard look before he finally understands.

"your upset" he sais as a matter of factually.

"Only slightly." I say irritatingly.

Bellamy then hold up his hands backing away. "Alright alright I'll back off." he sais with a wank before stopping and pointing at the fire pit for me to have my 'free time' there.

"Oh wow, thanks" I say sarcastically.

"Anytime princess, have fun but, not too much fun." He told me with a wink as miller walked up to him. I roll my eyes even though I know he doesn't see and turn back to the fire to see, thank the living lord, Lincoln. Only Octavia is with him.... Well... here goes nothing. I walk over awkwardly sitting next to Lincoln with Octavia on the opposite side. After a moment of silence I look past the large man to see Octavia in deep conversation with Monroe about the guard schedule is what I can guess. I didn't even see her slip away, I was too entranced in my worry and thoughts. I slowly lean over to Lincoln ear taking a quick glance back at Octavia to make sure she wasn't watching.

"Can I speak to you a moment?" I almost silently whisper into his ear, but he surprisingly understands what i had said and nods also glancing at Octavia as well before leading me away into his and Octavia's tent.

"So... whats up?" He casually asks

"We have a problem" I reply beginning to pace the width of the tent.

"Is it the tree crew?" he straightened up his posture even more as he steps forward thinking something great is about to happen.

"no... no I- It's me... actually" He gives me a worrying look. walking closer to me to grab my hand and drawl me to the bed. Sitting next to me. Then nudging me a little with his shoulder. Me and him have always been close and very similar in a lot of ways. I can't believe I am just seeing this now.

"What's up Griffin?" He passionately asks as if it is no big deal. Of course Octavia just had to walk in at this time before I could ask him the same question.

"Hey where di-" She stops short on her sentence as she questionably locks eyes with Lincoln and me and we quickly stand up from the bed awkwardly wipe our clothes with our hands as if to wipe off the conversation we just had.

"Hey... whats..." She points between us. "Going on?" She then folds her arms while shifting her wait looking expectantly at us for an answer.

This is going to be an interesting conversation.

I was the first one to speak after that. "Oh I was..." I look over at Lincoln desperately only to find he is as lost for an explanation as am I. "I wanted to ask Lincoln something." I figure telling the truth is the best option. Wish me luck.


	11. You'll Be Okay

Clarke:

Before I could Completely explain Octavia walks out of the tent not giving me the chance to explain.

Lincoln looks to me then jogs out of the tent. "Octavia!" I soon follow him to see Bellamy making his way towards me.

"Oh, Boy..." I mutter, but he catches it.

"Oh, Boy is right. What's going on? why were you in their tent?" I roll my eyes, walking past him towards the med bay.

"Just leave it alone bell." He snatches my arm and tugs me back to him. As he does the world before me starts to spin. I take a breath through my nose to try and stop this Mary-go-round. He doesn't notice of course because his anger seems to cloud his judgment, his grip tightens on my arm as I try to pull away, but fail.

"what's going on with you? hmm? first you distant and now your sneaking around with Lincoln!?"

My eye's widen at his accusation in shock. The lines on his forehead seem to tighten as if his patients shortens. "Excuse me?"

"You heard me!" He throws my arm away like it had burned him. "What the hell were you doing with Lincoln."

"Nothing! I was only asking something... Something! that has nothing to do with you the last time I checked! So why don't you take your controlling ass somewhere else that concerns you!" I shove my figure into his chest as he stumbles back more from my words than my motions. He then moves closer taking my upper arm and taking me to 'our' tent.

"Then why was Octavia so upset?" Once inside the tent for a more 'private' conversation he obvious couldn't help, but rush that question out. I feel dizzy once again and decide it would be best to sit down. He notices again. "what?" He steps towards me attempting to touch my shoulder, but I push him away still upset by his accusation. He doesn't deserve my answer right now.

"Octavia was upset with the same accusation you have" I glare up at him under my eye lashes trying to sooth my growing head ache by closing my eyes and putting my head in my hands. I can feel the air in the tent soften as the mood changes. I know Bellamy had just realized how an ass he was just being.

"Hey, Clarke?" I hear Lincolns voice from outside the tent. Not soon after I hear the tent flap tussle and look up to see the man himself. I offer him a shaky smile as my head ache seemed to worsen. It feels more like a migraine now I mentally wince at his worried expression shaking my head at him to not mention anything yet. He seems to realize Bellamy was right there and is not fully inside awkwardly shifting his weight. "May I speak to Clarke alone?" Bellamy looks to me worryingly then back to Lincoln. Slowly making his way around Lincoln giving him a 'We'll talk later look' at him. Lincoln nods at him then makes his way to me once Bellamy has completely left.

"You okay?" He kneels in front of me putting a reassuring hand on my knee. I shake my head no weakly. "Come here" He hold his arms out while standing up in front of me for me to balance with. I accepted his silent offer and allowed him to help me up, but as soon as I gets up the world spins again. I groans as my head starts to pound. He holds me still with his hands under my arm pits trying to catch my gaze. "What's going on?" I then goes limp in his arms as if my legs could no longer bare my weight.

"Bellamy!, Octavia!" He managed just before he caught me...

Bellamy:

I had been standing next to O near the fire when we hear out names yelled from the tent I had left not long ago. We dash to that spot to find them on the ground. "What happened!?" I panic at the sight of an unconscious Clarke. "Clarke?" I fall next to her as Lincoln denies me her. I look up to him about to yell a him to back off. He beats me to it. "Don't. I don't know what is wrong with her or if it's contagious, but you have to back off. I gotta get her to London"

I look at him in disbelief that anything is wrong with Clarke. "I'm sorry what? One I have already been around her so it's too late. Two your not taking her anywhere and Three! all she needs is rest." I try to take her again, but Lincoln stand up with her heading out. I follow.

"I'm afraid not. I've seen a case or two like this before. She needs treatment... now." I give up fighting with him and allow him to take her, but with me as well.


	12. Safe With Me

Bellamy:

I've been out here for hours. We are at Lincolns village practically begging for help. I'm sitting on a log next to a fire with my head in my hands crouched over. No more that 10 feet away from the tent Clarke is getting looked over in. I have no idea if she had waken up yet or even if she will not even if she was okay. My hands are shaking as I think about possible diagnosis.

Lincoln walk out of the tent with a sad look on his face as he runs his hands over his head and face. As if to wipe away thoughts he might have. He looks over to me seeing I have been here since they went in and haven't left. I'm terrified to ask what's going on. So I don't. I wait for him to find the courage to talk to me, say anything. Still trying to capture any words from the small murmurs inside the tent. Lincoln walks over silently putting a comforting hand on my shoulder as he sits next to me as if he was drained of his energy. I give him a worrying look, he's scaring me.

"Now, usually I would tell you to talk to Clarke, but..." He drags his eye's up from the ground to lock with mine, removing his hand from my shoulder. "She told me to tell you myself..." 

"She's awake?" hope fills my eye's that I could see her right now.

"Was" He looks back at the ground. I can still see the regret that drifted from his facial expression into the lingering air as he speaks again. "She's not okay." My shaking hands seem to shake even more, if possible.

"What are you talking about?" I grit my teeth together wishing for this to be some twisted joke. Expecting him to say something like 'She's not okay... she's great!' But he doesn't. he just locks eye's with me again and gives me a quivery smile as he finishes.

"She's got lung Cancer" His eye's look away as if he could not bare to see my reaction. What the fuck is he talking about? No she doesn't. She can't, this is Clarke Princess Griffin we are talking about here.

"No she doesn't" I spit at him, standing up. Challenging him.

"She told me you know." He stands up and moves to he is in front of me and the tent she await inside. "About how she kept loosing her breath, and had pain and swelling in her arms and legs sometimes. Plus the headache's... she has it." I try to step around him with tears in my eye's. I need her right now and I know damn well she needs me too.

"Get out of my way!" I practically growl at him as I shove him away.

"I can't do that, Bellamy" He shoves me back, I stumble over the side of the log and fall near the fire. It was like when I had fallen so was my guard. Once I hit that ground I broke down. Laying on my side I curl up and cry with my hands on my face, hiding me even though they could still see me. I hear footsteps over my sobs and a gust of wind. I look up to see Octavia sitting next to me, knees up to her chest as she uses her hand to sooth my arm. Like a mother to her child when they are in pain, or need comfort. Right now I am experiencing both. Lincoln must have left as I fell because I did not see him anywhere.

"I need to see her O, Please?" She shakes her head at me as I sit up.

"She told us she doesn't want to see you." Shock fills my face as I look up at her expectantly. "She looked..." She shakes her head again trying to regain that memory. "like she was afraid and... embarrassed?" Understandable given she was the oh so great Princess that has survived so much, to be brought down by a sickness. This wasn't just a sickness, she has to understand that. This was much greater. She continues though. "Lincoln said that they have medicine that will help her, but not heal her. They came up with this a couple of decades ago, after the war. I hate to say this, but with out the medicine she could die. This will keep her alive for a while." Tears come to her eye's as well. "There is a chance that it will keep her alive. Some people survive and some... die anyways."

"I guess we'll see her reaction from the medicine then." I look over at the tent with hope and anxiety lingering in my chest.

"She doesn't want it bell-" Her voice breaks as she give's me more heart breaking news. "she said she doesn't want to live like that. Dependent on medicine. She also said she doesn't want to take away medicine from those who might need it more. But, the fact is the grounders have plenty and they know how to make more she just... is stubborn I guess."

I scoff even though I completely understand why she decided that, but I will not allow her stubbornness get in the way of her life, ever. "Get the medicine ready, I got it." She looks back at me grabbing my arm before I could stand.

"Bell... She doesn't want to see you."

"She also doesn't want that medicine... Medicine that could potentially save her! I'm the only one that could change that. By taking me away from her... your killing her." I am so sick and tired of people trying to control me. I will do what I want when I want. She caves in. letting me go and waving me away, allowing me to got o her.

I walk into the med tent to see her sleeping in the cot on the far left. Feet towards me. A wet cloth folded and laid on her forehead. I walk over and get on my knees taking her hand in mine. I stoke back her damp hair that lays above the cloth. The darkness consumes me as I lay my head on the cot and drift away.

. . .

I wake again to see Clarke's exhausted face staring at me in confusion. The early sunlight peeks through the thin material of the tent between the thick furs that covers the place. She smiles at me. Actually smiles at me as the confusion disappears. It's warm in her compared to the unforgiving cold winds that fly through the camp outside.

I lift my head ready to give an argument about the medicine. Her other hand is lifted and stops me from continuing.

"I already took it bell." Relief strikes me as I breath a sigh.

"I love you." I bring my hand back to her hair.

"I love you too." She smiles again and squeezes my hand that is still holding hers.

'you'll be safe with me.' I think to myself.


	13. Nice Try Princess

Clarke:

Right now Lincoln is speaking to Bellamy, my mom and I about what 'I shouldn't do' Just what I want to hear. We returned to camp about an hour ago. It's mid day and we are still in my tent. I'm laying down as everyone stands around me.

"Okay, well I would suggest for the moment for you to be on bed rest for a few days, let the medicine take effect. We still don't know if it will work for you. If it does work you need to take this-" He holds out a syringe filled with a greenish, blue liquid. "-once a week. on that certain day you need it in the morning and at night okay?" I roll my eye's, yet shake my head in agreement. "This." He then picks up a few makeshift tea packets form the side table. "You need to have everyday, it will help with controlling your breathing and boost your energy. It can also keep the migraines at bey. Though I suggest for now for you to be totally relaxed until we know how well you take stress." I grumble and nod again.

So much responsibility and I know Bellamy will be on my ass every moment of the day. Great... just what I need. Lincoln nods back and sets the packets down, leaving us to talk. I sigh and slump down into my cot. My mother pats my arm, smiling at me before leaving us. Bellamy gives me a concerned look as he sits next to me on the end of the cot.

"Please don't" I shake my head at him.

"What?" He looks at me intently.

"Don't start. not now."

"What are you talking about?" He shrugs his shoulders at me. Does he really want to act childish right now?

"The hovering Bellamy! You know what I'm talking about. Don't get me started." I snap at him. Regretting it a bit as I watch his face fall even more.

"Someone has to" He looks away playing with the cotton blanket at the end of my makeshift bed.

"I know Bell but,..." I shake my head trying to find words to define what I'm trying to say... What am I trying to say? "I'm fi-"

"Don't even try that on me, It wont work" He cuts me off abruptly. Looking straight back at me. letting me know he's serious. The crease between his brows already show me that though. "your obviously NOT okay Clarke!" He raises his voice more. Never leaving my eye's. "Your-" He doesn't finish as his voice breaks him off. Tears line his eye's, daring to break loose. He fights them back though they seems to be winning as one slips away. He looks away as if he was embarrassed.

"Come here." I hold open my arms scooting over to the left as he slides in next to me. Holding my against him tightly. I feel his frame shake as he releases small sobs. It breaks me to see I did this to him. Our legs entwine trying to get closer if possible. Lincoln walks in with a metal cup, Probably my tea. He doesn't say a word instead he sets it down on the makeshift side table near me. I think him with my eye's and a small smile. He leaves before Bellamy could notice.

"Snow!" Someone yells from outside the tent.

Bellamy and I break away smiling at each other in excitement. He jumps up and grabs my hand, helping me up. We both practically run outside to find a white sheet covering the ground. The grass still peeks through begging to live longer. No chance. Small flakes filter the air around us. Bellamy bends down and picks up some snow. isn't that cold? I find out soon because he throws it at my chest. I gasp in shock. Wow that is cold.

"Oh now your going to get it Blake." He eye's me in challenge. I bend down ignoring the biting cold and pick up snow to throw. I stand back up ready to throw to see he wasn't there. I search in front of me. Just as I was about to turn I feel pressure on my back and whip around to find his devilish smirk.

"Oh I see how it is." I throw mine, he dodges it easily bending down.

"Nice try, Princess" He laughs his adorable laugh before he turns and runs. I run after him around the tents and the wooden 'houses' still being constructed just for this vary reason. Children laughing and shrieks fill the air. A large grin finds it's way to my face. I have the perfect plan. I see him hiding behind a tent peeking around it for me. He'll see me if I duck so I pretend to slip. I know I'm evil, but he's playing unfair. I give a fake shriek and fall.

"Clarke?!" I hear the concern in his voice. regret fills me, but as I scrunch my fingers to grasp the snow I get ready to strike. He kneels next to me. I'm on my back, eye's closed. "Jesus, Clarke! You Okay!!" He shakes my shoulders. Now. I swiftly lift my hand and strike right under his chin with the snow.

"Gotcha!" I yell as I sit up to see Lincoln and Octavia behind Bellamy. Lincoln breaths a sigh of relief as Octavia laughs at my stupidity, walking away dragging Lincoln along. I look back to Bellamy to see his shocked expression. Not bothering to wipe away the lingering cold of the snow that still stuck to him, slowly melting. His face shifts to anger as he scolds me.

"Don't you ever fucking do shit like that AGAIN CLARKE!" He grabs my forearm as he drags me into my tent. He pulls me onto my bed then stands and starts pacing the length of the tent before he meets my sorry eye's and drops in front of me. He grabs the bottom, sides of my face facing me towards him. "don't! do that Clarke and I mean it!" I nod in agreement. I know now that it went too far. How could I do that? He lunges forward and embraces me. We lay down on the bed holding each other.

"You scared the shit out of me." He brings me closer.

"I'm so sorry bell..." I turn towards him and look him in the eye's. I look back over at the table and see my tea that must be cold by now. Bellamy follows my line of sight. Reaching over me he grabs it and sits up with me. He hands it to me I smile at him, thankful for him. I down it now noticing how thirsty I must have been. He smiles and takes it away as he sets it back down.

"I love you." He whispers as we bring ourselves closer again.

"I love you too." I repeat.


	14. Not An Update.

This is my newest story: 'Our One Solution' I came up with in Class today. I would like to tell everyone I am in winter guard now meaning I have practice Monday and Wednesday night as long as Saturday mornings. Please check out the new story and I will try and update any time I can.


	15. 15. Your People Need You

Clarke:

I'm feeling so much better. The medicine has been doing wonders. Lincoln sais it may be working though it could recoil and stop working as I may have a defective DNA sample that repels and kills me. Right now we made a plan to get our people out and we are arriving very soon. Bellamy's fingers are intertwined with mine as he walks to my right down this steep slope. Lexa, Octavia and Lincoln are a head of us as the grounder army march's behind us like a herd of elk.

Bellamy squeezes my hand, catching my attention. My eye's snap up to lock with his. He offers a nervous smile. "We're nearly there." He sais as a matter of factly.

I look to the ground as my nerves light up like a Christmas tree. "I know." I murmur sadly.

"Speaking of which..." I look back up at him when he releases my hand and shuffles with his bag as we pull off to the side. As a result everyone else stops, knowingly. Lincoln comes up to help Bellamy as I sigh.

"Bell, I just took it before we left." I shrug at him.

"Clarke, you must take this more frequently now as your body now depends on it." Lincoln interrupts. "You have to take another in about an hour as well. I sigh as I run my hand over my head, pulling the loose strands of hair out of my face. Bellamy beckons me towards him with his finger. I walk over to him as we stare into each others eye's lovingly. Lincoln grabs the upper arm of my right arm. Both me and Bellamy look at the old shot mark's from previous times which look like constellations in the night sky. Bellamy sighs as well.

I hiss as he injects the fluids into my veins of my inner elbow. The Liquid stings my veins as it is released further into me. Once it's over we continue walking while Lincoln hands me a canteen of the urbal tea I 'Must' drink in order to continue the strength and go on. This is not including my necessary tea that I practically downed before leaving.

The dark, gloomy sky illuminates the white Mt. Weather door ahead of us. It's dark shadow flows outward towards the damn to its left, Even with out the sun. A warrior cry is released into the wind my Lexa and soon followed by Lincoln, Octavia and Many other grounders. Me and Bellamy share a worried look before we both scream into the bitter wind as well. We charge the door. Knives, swords and machetes are raised towards the titanium door. Our engineers and 'nerds' as what Raven would call them get to work on setting the door up for the explosion. Raven and wick should be getting the generators down any minute now.

About a half an hour later the lights to the great 'empire' goes out as I was about to press the button, lexa snatches it and looks around at her warriors as they cheer for her before she presses it her self. I huff at her childish behavior before charging with the rest of them into the broken mountain. Bellamy grabs my hand for security measurement as we rush through and into a long hallway. Flashing lights and alarms ring out through the halls. An echo replaces each silence in between each ring. More yelling occurs as Mt. Weathers men shoot at as many of the warriors as they could. I pull my gun out and make sure it is loaded as Bellamy does the same. Some of our own guns go off from the Ark solders rush in with the rest of the grounders. Static reaches the radios. I pull it off my belt as I practically yell over the noise.

"What was that?"

"Raven and wick were taken!" A frantic voice reaches past the static. Millers dad. He volunteered to spy and turn off the acid fog when they denied him anything else to do to help his son out.

"What do you mean taken?" I yell back.

"The Mt. Men they..." He suddenly stopped as a must have released the button from his finger. "They came in and took them after the explosion in there. Look I don't have long before they find me... You gotta get them out!"

"Where are you!" I look back at Bellamy who is helping and man back up off the ground. I take this chance to slip around people and into another hall to listen easily. He doesn't answer. "Officer Miller!" I try and catch his attention if he was still there. No answer. "Damn it" I mutter under my breath as I walk the long hall and past a few doors not forgetting to peek inside a few as I pick up speed. They need help damn it and I'm gonna be the one to help them. But, where could they be this mountain has to be acres long. Not to mention I'm dead if either Bellamy or Lincoln finds that I've gone with out protection. Oh well. People need me and I'm useless in there.

I really need ideas this was just a filler chapter I need ideas to continue. thank you ;)


	16. Eye Of The Tiger

Clarke:

"Officer Miller!" I try again through the radio in hope maybe the frequency would pick up the channel if that's even the problem. I mean he could be hurt and unable to contact me. God I gotta get there now. I peer through another window to see medical supplies stacked on high shelves and racks all around the room. Organization is no where to be seen. My Medicine! damn it I forgot I had to take it every few hours. Oh well whats a while more. My thoughts were interrupted by a *clang* sound. I whip my head in the direction I heard it come from.

"Officer Miller!" I whisper yell towards a metal door to my left.

"Here." I hear weak voice mutter. I try and open the door to find it locked.

"Open the door, It's locked." Another whisper erupts from the voice inside. Next thing I know the door swings open and I take a tentative step inside. Silence pierces the air, That's odd. Once fully inside the door whips closed as if this were a horror movie and I were the dumb blonde that gets killed off first. Surprisingly not while making out with the air headed boyfriend. I freeze in my spot listening to the harsh breathing behind me. This is definitely not Officer Miller.

"What did you do to him?" I spit at the person behind me, not daring to confront.

The lights switch on which makes me jump for a moment before it reveals officer miller being held by a knife at his throat. The man behind him holds a menacing smile.

"Welcome princess." I wince at the nickname. Where did he hear that. The man standing at the door grabs my arms and tightens them behind my back. Officer Miller tries to speak, but I'd cut off by the night tightening its placing at his neck. A squeak is released. Well now I know why his voice sounded so weak before, these bastards were here.

"What the hell do you want?" My tone earns me a good tug at my arms.

The man smiles again. "Call me Emerson." he holds out the hand that isn't holding a knife to my friends dad. I stare at the hand in disgust. He pulls back and starts to tighten his hold on Nate's dad again.

"Hey! I can't help you if you don't tell me what the hell you want!" I yell in frustration.

Am I the only sane person here? Why are they playing these dumb games and just tell me what they want! "Bone marrow." He answers bluntly.

"No." I answer strictly. My confidence is going to get me in trouble one day, But these asses aren't going to win this round.

"No?" He cocks his head to the side in question.

"Did I stutter?" I lean forward in sarcastic surprise. His face hardens in anger at me and shoves Mr. Miller to the ground as he strikes him again with a kick to the ribs. He writhes on the floor in pain.

"Flattery will get you no where." He replies sarcastically. He then comes forward and grabs my chin as if to be romantic. Bastard. I spit in his face. It lands on his chin. He closes his eye's in shock as he wipes it off with the back of his hand. Once he comes back to the world he smiles and gives a short laugh. I look at him in confusion. Then realizing he's a crazy bitch and smile back with mockery lit like a flame in my eye's.

Before I could react he back hands me then brings his hand back and slaps me again. My mouth hangs open in shock. The man who still has me in his hold throws me against the wall with enough force to brake a bone, leaving me to fall on the ground near Mr. Miller in pain. I also get a swift kick to my stomach. Nausea hits me like a bullet and almost makes me vomit, but I keep it down. I wont give them the pleasure.

I watch helplessly trying to catch my breath as he brings the knife to Mr. Millers throat and slices it.

"No!" I scream despite the crack in my voice as tears spill over their boundaries. I'll kill everyone in this damn mountain.

"That was punishment for your act." He gets in my face on the floor before walking away and picking the mans body from the floor. I get on my hands in knees, trying to breath through the grief. "We have five minutes before his entire body shuts down get every damn last piece of his bone marrow that you can." he glances at me again. "And tie her up... we don't need her to go and to something stupid." well... shit.

He drags me against a pole near the door and toes me with an old itchy rope that they probably found hanging an old ladies laundry with. he then unexpectedly pushes a cloth like thing against my nose and mouth. I try to turn away, but his other hand holds me in place. Darkness consumes me.


	17. Wanheda.

Bellamy:

I have been searching for Clarke for the past hour. The moment I turned around and saw her gone to say I freaked is to say the least. I panicked I mean we're in the middle of a battle with the MT. Men and she is still fighting her own battle with her own body. I frantically peek through each window of every door I pass in hopes to find her. It's been so long since her last shot. The last thing I want is for her body to go through withdrawal somewhere no one can find her... if she's not already- No! don't think that.

"Clarke!" My hoarse voice echo's off the abandoned halls. I have been calling for her forever. I run my rough hands through my jagged hair once more.

"Where are you?" I whisper to myself. the last glimmer of hope starts to slip through my fingers as I lean against a door on the left side of the hall. I slowly slide down the door and sit on the floor trying to come up with some sort of plan to get through all of this. Damn I need a drink. Lost in thought I begin to focus on my breathing instead. I have to focus.

*boom*

The fuck? I jump from the floor. The sound came from behind the door that I was just leaning against. I drawl my hand gun from my waist and walk towards it and lean my ear against it, trying to listen.

"What are we going to do about her?" Shuffling came soon after the voice.

"Well if you would focus on drilling and not dropping the damn thing I could find out." A scraping sound comes after before the drill must have been turned back on. A sickening smell leaked through the door soon after the sound. It takes everything I have not to gag. I click off the safety to my gun and cock it back ready to shoot. I pull myself away from the door and ram myself into it. The door swings open to get a good look at the body laying coldly on the metal table with a man holding a drill covered in blood. It's everywhere. The floor his hands, the body. The smell hits my nose, I move my head to the side to cover my nose with my shoulder. This is sick.

Emerson. I see him standing in shock, just staring at me before he recovers with an evil smirk that could make plants coil in disgust. I shoot the man with the drill in his stomach. Bastard. He falls limply to the floor. Emerson doesn't even flinch as if he expected that. God I hate this man. My eye's catch something yellow. Clarke. Her hands are tied behind her back and to a pole. Her neck rolls to the side as her hair falls over her face, gracefully. I sigh in relief that she was still breathing.

Emerson's laugh catches my attention. A cold look must have crossed my face because he raises his eyebrow in challenge. He then holds out his arms as if to say 'come and get me' I raise my gun and aim it directly to his head. He smiles and gives an 'oh okay' look.

"Finally reached your Princess I see?" He shrugs. I scowl at him. "Her knight in shining armor" he continues amusingly. "How cute. Though it seems this fairly tale won't end in a happily ever after. He gives a crooked look as he takes a tentative step forward. I put my finger on the trigger to show I wasn't joking around and he freezes. "I don't think so." He say's before he ducks out of the way. My gun goes off before I could comprehend his movement. He seems to get a hold of this small box with a button on it, a big red one at that fact. I try to shoot him again, but my gun drawls an empty sound. Damn I'm out.

He laughs menacingly at the fact. He stands up and leans against the metal table. I look over to see who was really on the table. Oh god. I sigh with grief as I realize its miller's dad. I'll kill ever damn man in this mountain. I relax my arms and bring the gun down to my sides. I look back over to Clarke, she's still out. There's no way she fell asleep. Emerson cuts off my train of thoughts.

"A barbiturate-induced coma" he say's blandly. "I know its used for patients with brain injuries to reduce the amount of nerve activity in the brain, but don't worry. It won't cause any long term complications..." He pauses for a moment. "Hopefully." That's it.

I rush forward as if to tackle him, but he holds the button up as if to press it. I quickly stop not knowing what it's for yet and not risking anything.

"You see when the princess passed out we strapped a bomb to her and with the press of this button I could set it off and she'll be dead. Along with us and many other people here. You wouldn't want that would you?" He tilts his head to the side in question. I don't answer in case I antagonize him to do something I'll regret. "How rude." He replies. He starts to put pressure on the button.

"Hey!" I yell desperately.

"Ah. so he does speak." He starts to walk forward and towards Clarke. "Lat's see what else you have to say." He leans down in front of Clarke and sets the button down while searching his coat.

"Get away from her, now." I threaten him. He pays no mind to me as he withdrawals a cloth and holds it to Clarke's mouth and nose. I step forwards in surprise as she awakens.

"Sleeping beauty has awaken." He strokes her cheek. My blood runs cold at his actions. She coughs as she lifts her head and takes a look around at her surroundings. She spots me and smiles in relief before she notices Emerson and shrinks away from him. "No need darling." He say's calmly. He stands and shoves the cloth back and picks the button back up. Clarke studies him cautiously. Her eye's then land on the dead bodies on and next to the table. She stares in confusion.

"Ah. yes. It seems you've missed quite the show, my love." He looks around amusingly. "Oh and I also strapped a bomb to you that is being controlled by this here button." He holds out the button on emphasis.

"What the hell do you want" She mutters. He smiles at that.

"Oh, my favorite question." He bounces on his heals with excitement. What a child. "What do I want." He brings the button up to his face as if to think. This man is mad. "Hmm... Ah. I have it." He uses the hand holding the box and lifts his finger to the sky as if to show he had an idea. "Revenge." He answers darkly. "Let's get to it... shall we wanheda?" Both me and Clarke wince at the almost random name and look at each other in confusion.

"You Don't know?" He asked completely flabbergasted. "Do you recall the mass murder of the tri-crew? lovely? well it seems they have come up with a name for you which is in fact 'wanheda' meaning 'commander of death.' after your murder of your ex lover... Finn? Yes I believe that was his name." He starts to walk calmly back and forth from the table to the wall to their left. Clarke starts to look to the ground as I shift my weight nervously.

"Well after him they came up with it. They also have this belief where you." He points to Clarke. "Hold the power of death. Kill Wanheda, you get her power."

"I am no one." She interrupts. He walks over and leans in front of her lifting her chin with his free hand. She glares at him. "Not to Finn apparently." All of Clarke's control must have snapped. She spits right in the mans face. He freezes in surprise before smiling and laughing while he backs away and wipes it with an unreadable face. "Cute." Is all he say's before he turns his back to us and stills. He seems to be composing himself.

I slowly walk towards Clarke, trying not to temp the already unstable man. How the hell are we supposed to get out of here? I slowly get on my knees beside Clarke never turning my back to the man. I pull her face to me and cup her face and give her a look that say's 'I'll get us out, I promise.' She seems to somewhat understand. As she never really seems to look at me and instead through me like to be in thought. We bring our foreheads together and close our eye's for just a moment. I then release her and stand back up.

I quietly make my way to Emerson and jump on his back. He falls to the ground dropping the button. It thankfully lands right side up and not on the button. I bring my hands around Emerson neck and try to choke him. His hands fly all over searching for something. I press harder trying to end him as soon as possible. He finds something cold and metal and slams it against my skull. My vision blurs as he pushes me off of him. I hear him gasping for breath as he regains his strength. Wow that hurt. I hold my head as I use my other hand to hold my upper body off the ground.

I hear a grunt and then- "Bellamy look out!" Clarke shouts. I don't react fast enough though as he hits me again with this object. I can't pass out now, not now. Please. Before another thought could cross my mind darkness consumes them as I fall back onto the hard ground and pass the fuck out.


	18. Wild Flowers

Bellamy:

I feel completely dizzy. I can feel my body moving from side to side. Quiet murmurs echo inside my head. I hear myself grunt as I open my eye's and attempt to sit up completely disoriented.

"Whoa whoa Bellamy wait." Octavia reaches out pushes me back down as miller and Murphy both lower me to the ground. I find I'm strapped to a stretcher.

"Hey big brother." She brushes my curls away from my fore head. I give a weak smile back.

"God." I shut my eye's as a wave of pain fills my senses. O unties me allowing me to reach up behind my head as if to comfort the pain. "That hurts"

"yeah, I think you got yourself a concussion." She smirks half heatedly.

"what the hell happened." I look around at the group before me. Miller has a frown along with Murphy and jasper. They're not telling me something. I abruptly sit up ignoring the oncoming migraine that starts to show. Clarke.

"Where's Clarke?" I shakily ask. Octavia puts a hand on my shoulder. I look back at her as she hands me a pill and a canteen. I push it away glaring at her. "Where the hell is she?" I spit at her once more.

She sighs sagging her shoulders. "Abby, Kane, Lincoln and Monty are with her." She drops her head with a sad expression. "They're trying to get the bomb off her." My breath leaves my body. Oh god it's still on her.

"Then why the hell are we here and not with them." I growl darkly at her.

"You have a concussion Bellamy. We are taking you back to camp while Abby is fixed on getting Clarke safe again." She raises her eye brow's in challenge.

"Then let Clarke come with us!" I'm getting a little irritated by this situation. Maybe more.

"Bellamy your being completely irrational right now, Clarke has a BOMB on her. Don't you get that?" She stands up straight with her hands on her hips. "A bomb Bellamy-"

"Yeah I know!" my frustration bubbles on top of my temper. "I was there Octavia now get to the damn point would ya?"

"The point is if that bomb goes off while they are trying to get it off her, we can't risk our people getting hurt. Only a few stayed behind!" She yelled.

I stand up quickly as the throbbing in my head continues. "There is no way in hell I'm going any further with out knowing she's okay." I point to the ground as if to prove a point.

Octavia sighs again before going through her pack that was laying on the ground and pulling out a radio. She clicked i to a station then gave it to me. I give her quizzical stare.

"Radio in, you in love dumb ass" She shakes her head at me impatiently.

"Bellamy to Kane." I speak through the radio confidently. I stare at the group of trees surrounding us awaiting an answer. "Bellamy to Kane" I repeat a little more nervous than before. I look to everyone too scarred to ask again. They all give me a defeated look before they start tearing up at the sound of radio silence. "Answer me! is anyone there?!" I have a death grip on the radio now any more and it's fall apart.

"Bellamy..." Octavia calls. My eye's trace where she was. She was standing a little farther away looking over some trees that we could see past on this small hill. I follow her gaze to see a black smoke rising above the horizon.

"No..." I whisper. "No!" Sobs rack my body a long with the whimpers of Octavia. The others just comfort each other as I just can't help, but stare at the black cloud. She's gone. I loved her so much, and she's gone. "no." I point at the cloud. "I will not accept this." I walk down the hill towards the mountain.

"Bellamy wait!" I can hear her steps behind me as she tries to catch up to me. "No! Bellamy you can't, you don't want to see it." She grabs my arm and twists me to look at her. tears strain both our cheeks as we grieve. "Come here, bell" She grabs my shoulder and gives me a tight hug. I loosely wrap my arms around her waste. My face buries it's self in her hair as I cry with her. I try to pretend it's Clarke I was hugging, but it doesn't work. I cry harder. soon enough Octavia calms as we lay on the ground stroking my hair while I'm still crying. I soon cry myself to sleep while she hums something our mother used to.

\----------------------------------------------------

I wake up with the sun. I stare at my tent ceiling for a while before getting up. I really don't feel like doing anything today. I sit there on my bed and quietly cry to myself at the sight of Clarke's sketch book. I lay my ass back down and cover my self with our furs. It felt like I was asleep for just a minute before Octavia walks in and pulls my furs away.

"Why are you in Clarke's tent?" Her eyes glow a red as the evidence of her tears weren't wiped away correctly.

"Because it's Clarke's tent." I glare at her. "Plus I already woke up here.

"jasper..." She whispers.

I drag the covers over me once again. She yanks them off me again. I huff at her. "what?"

"You weren't the only one who lost someone Bellamy." She replies calmly. "You don't see me huddled in my tent feeling sorry for myself." Her voice raises slightly with ever word of encouragement.

"That's good for you O." I spit words of poison at her. She raises her eye brows and scrunch her hands to her sides. She seems to have given up as her expression softens at my weakened and tearful state. she simply and quietly walks out. Not what you would expect from her but... okay. I'm too tired to deal with this.

\-----------------------------------------------

The day seemed to have passed quickly as I try to choke down my food O brings for me to eat. I can't seem to get my appetite back. Clarke was the only thing keeping me going those days, O's the only thing I have left keeping me steady. If that's even the right term for what I'm feeling right now. God how can people live like this. Losing so many people. I guess you call those the bad guys for getting revenge. I've only learned that revenge is a dish best served forgotten.

The next day O comes in with my rations for breakfast. Before she could leave I catch her arm. There's something that's been bothering me.

"Where's cage?" She looks at me patiently. She then walk to the bed and sits down next to me.

"When we found you guys cage was..." She sucks in a breath. "Cage was trying to leave with Clarke." She refuses eye contact with me as she speaks, trying to recall her memory. "We stopped him with a machete to the heart. He's dead." She sighs once more. "As for the rest of mount weather... most were dead some got away. So we decided to radiate the mountain. It was a group decision as to not take any more risks." Tears fall onto her combined hands on her lap. I place my hand over them in comfort. She looks up and smiles at me.

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	20. 20. Silent Night

Bellamy:

I busy myself with shifts at the wall. A part of me hopes to watch her coming through the trees and come back to us. I could feel my heart physically ache every time I think about her. Which is at a constant since everything reminds me of her. 

 

The grass reminds me of our little trip outside of the wall.

The breeze reminds me of the ocean smell of her hair.

The sky reminds me of her eye's, So deep and full of compassion.

The sun reminds me of her hair color.

Children's laughter reminds me of our happiness together.

I stare at the trees that stand tall across the field as I stand on the perch on the wall for guards. People have been asking me everyday what we're going to do now with out our leaders. Each time I tell them that we will be fine. I made myself busy with plans for the spring. I cling to my coat as the breeze picks up again. I sit on the planks holding me up and lean against the wall while staring out in the distance. It's peaceful outside of the wall. Even though I'm right outside of the wall it almost greener over here than it is inside the camp.

Someone taps on my shoulder and I look up to see miller. He gives me a soft smile before nodding towards the camp to show my shift was over. I shake my head at him.

"I'll take your shift go get some food." I mumble as I look away from him.

He doesn't bother to fight with me knowing I'll just win. He walks away shortly after. I just need the distraction. By the time night falls the weather seems to die down though light snow flakes fill the quiet air. I start to drift into a peaceful sleep when shouting ensues. I curse under my breath as I stand up and rub my eye's.

Other guards that have taken up residence on other parts of the walls start yelling to each other and point towards a certain group a tree yards away. I hold up my gun and look through the scope just in time to hear.

"Grounders!" Before they start shooting. I see nothing.

"Hold your fire!" I scream at them. They stop after about 5 more rounds and stare at me, eye's wide with fear and surprises. "Idiots" I follow on.

"We saw grounders!" A man as young as 18 answers.

"And how do you know that!" I yell back before looking through my scope and finally catch on a few figures.

"The hell?" I hear miller climb the wall and jump over onto the perch. He too looks through the scope of his gun. I look through mine right after and we watch them approach. The dark shadows of the trees fall away as the figures come into view through the moon light. One of them yell.

"Abby" I hear miller whisper. He's right I can see Abby and what looks like... Kane! and... I can also see what looks to be Monty I assume with Lincoln, but it's then I see them yelling.

"Open the gate!" I yell as they get closer. Miller and I jump over the wall and climb down the latter as fast as we can.

"Hold your fire!" Kane yells as the walk up to the gate. Octavia runs up behind me and watches with disbelief. They are still pretty far away, but I know it's them. I run to them and as I get closer I see Clarke come out from behind Kane and look at me with a watery smile.

"Clarke!" I scream 

 

"Bell." She sobs as she too runs at me. We meet half way, arms wide open with the biggest smiles on our faces. We were about 10 feet away before a gun shot echo's between the trees and the ark. Everyone jumps as we kept running at each other. Her movement become slower though I can barley tell at the moment as I rush forward and with out a doubt, crash into her body with an embrace. She holds onto me weirdly. Its then I look down at her face and see her foggy eye's stare back.

"Bell..." She whimpers. My eye brows crease with misunderstanding before it clicks. The gun shot, her slow pace, the look in her eye's. 

 

"No" I pull away and hold her at arms length while looking her over. There was a huge red stain on the right side of her abdomen just under her ribs. She collapses in my arms. I fall to my knees with her and hold her to my chest.

"Abby!" I yell desperately.

"Hold your god damn fire!" Octavia yells behind us at the gate. Someone shot her. They must have still not seen it was one of our own. Probably thought she was attacking. I'll kill 'em.

I lower her to the ground and cup her face while she hiccups a few short sobs. She's in shock as am I.

"Clarke, baby please." She locks eye's with me while I shakily move my hands down to her wound and put pressure on it. She's losing too much blood. I only faintly notice Abby kneeling down next to her after running to us and putting her hands over mine adding more pressure. She starts yelling orders.

"Monty run ahead and get everything ready in the med bay, Have Lincoln help you. Before you go have Octavia come here." Monty nods before him and Lincoln run off. "Kane I need something to keep pressure on her wound. Cloths or something." Kane takes his coat off then grabs the hem of his short and rubs that over his head as well then handing it to Abby before putting his coat back on.

"Bellamy, I need you to take her coat off... Now" I rip myself from my thoughts and work on the buttons of her coat. Once that's out of the way she resumes pressure on the wound, this time with Kane's shirt over it. Octavia sits next to Clarke's head before I realize it's her and tries to keep Clarke awake. I should be doing that, but I can't fucking move. I feel the tears fall down my cheeks unable to wipe them away I let them fall where ever. 

 

Soon Lincoln runs over and tells Abby everything is read before kneeling beside me and O and grabbing Clarke's arm. He then gives her the shot of medicine she must have gone without for a long time.

"That should give her more strength as well." He say's before attempting to pick her up.

"No" I mumble before pushing him away. Everyone gets up and start to go back to camp and gets stuff together. I then run my hands over her beautiful face watching her watch me with love in her eye's. "You're going to be okay." I then lift her up bridle style with her head leaning against the right side of my body. People run ahead as to keep others away. I constantly kiss her forehead all the way to the med bay and say things like "You'll be okay", "I won't let anything happen to you", "The idiot will pay for this." and "Don't you dare leave me, princess." 

 

Once inside the med bay they push me out and lock the doors. I don't fight them because of my weakened state both emotionally and physically. Maybe even mentally I don't know. All I remember was I soon fell asleep outside the med bay doors.

******************************************************

It's morning when I wake up again. There's a rick in my neck from leaning against the hard wood all night. I roll my neck around before standing up and reaching the doors. I listen quietly to any commotions that may show that anyone was still working on her. I don't know what scares me more. The fact that no one woke me up from my sleep with news. Or the dead silence in camp and he med bay. Almost like everyone was trying to understand yesterdays events.

I test the doors to see if they were locked only to find that they were open. I eagerly pushed my way through and looked around to find no one. I went though the long hall and looked through the windows of each room. I finally came upon some beautiful blonde hair laying peacefully in a cot. Abby lays her head on the cot, hand in hand with her daughter while asleep in a chair. I smile to myself knowing she at least seems okay. I open the door slowly and walk in. 

 

Wooden chairs sit against the walls. I pull one over to the right side of her bed and grab her left hand. She randomly jumps and opens her eye's. I didn't expect her to be awake so my eye's widen as if this could be a dream.

"Clarke" I smile.

"Bell." She smiles back and squeezes my hand. Happy tears fill my eye's along with hers. I pull my forehead to rest against hers. We then quietly cry together.


End file.
